thank you, Shallow, for allowing me to contribute for the men.
Summer aahh!! First, let us all put our hands together for the sunshine and the brighter days. The Philippines, Land of Beauty, Sunshine and… a very Shy Beach Culture!! What?? Did I just say that?
After flipping through photos of a recent trip to Boracay, I was actually kinda saddened because with all the hype of the beach, sand and sunshine, I noticed fellow beach-goers were still wrapped up in jeans, relatively beach-like shirts (old business shirts) and the beach sandals that look like they could second for construction boots ala super duper Crocs. I’m talking bout the men… Ladies fashion to be commented on later.
Gone are the days when rolled up jeans and white shirts passed as beach attire. Not water friendly, very drab and just a hint of  ”look at me I am a pirate with my cutoffs”. If I had to choose three things I could take out of the Beach Scene nowdays,  it would be:
The Nut Huggers
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swimming trunks (ballus prisona/budgee smugglers)
Smite he who weareth the tight spandex number, unless you are a super model… actually no… keep them at home or stay in the water… So we can’t see you.
The Makeshift Beach Shorts
denim shorts
Oh c’mon a little effort please. We have all seen these and we all know someone who wears them… For shame…
The Over-Tanned Foreigner
donatella versace with an overtan
We love Donatella, but you know what I mean with the tan : )
OK. Maybe not so much the last one (they bring money into the country lol), but I mean sometimes don’t you just wish you could say easy on the tan-oil. Anyways, back to the point… A fellow traveler on the way to our island getaway asked me a if I was going for a Pro-Am competition. I asked “Why?” and he pointed out the obvious, which was me dressed head to toe in Quiksilver. I am talking hat, shirt, boardies, backpack and my duffel Bag. Only My Oakley Oildrum Sunglasses split the Sponsored Surfer Image. I turned to a large window in the airport to check myself out and was like totally… HAPPY! Yes, I was in my fave beachwear from my fave beach company and I was asked if I was a Surfer. SWEET! (I am shallow)
Gentlemen, summer vacation is about hanging up that work hat, taking off the suit and just chillaxing. Just because you work in an office don’t mean you bring it to the beach. Get into it, enjoy the shirt-less, sweat infused, drenching warmth of the sun or if not bikini style atmosphere. Dig in and express yourself. The great thing about beach wear is that there are plenty simple or loud designs to just bring out that inner sun god (provided you can even go on a summer break).
I also realized getting geared up for the beach can pack a wallop to your wallet. So now I also understand the whole denim shorts on the beach thing. The metro really makes the beach experience expensive even before you leave. But with an okay budget, one can gear up for a summer fiesta.
So the Essentials:
BOARDIES
The summer equivalent to a cold beer after a long week. But Boardies need to be worn with authority. Your board shorts are a reflection of you… crazy, cool or simple. Wear boardies with pride.
A few faves I have seen and want:
billabong LSD eco-shorts spring 09 collection
Billabong’s feast for the eyes will keep stoned friends entertained for hours. Incorporates eco-friendly technology.
quiksilver my dog spot shorts
These shorts are too cool… Will add to the delight of those special medicated friends who stare at the LSD shorts. Throw them a curve ball and switch shorts.
quiksilver raimana shorts
Polynesian design influenced by the Samoan Tatau/Maori Ta Moko (Tattoo). So you can get the design on the same part of you body and take it off, rather than suffer immense pain by having the tattoo smacked into you skin using wood and sharks teeth. Thank god for technology.
Most board shorts can be found at the signature stores or from outlets all around malls. Can be anywhere from p600, if you are lucky, to about p1400.
SUNGLASSES
Not only do they help you from developing cataracts, they also hide your dodgy eyes peeking at the bikini clad ladies on the beach. Sunglasses also add that extra layer of cool, but beware!! Failure to observe the sunglass switch rule (i.e., take them off from time to time and put on a hat) will result in the highly embarassing PANDA eye effect.
I love the these little numbers
electric velveteen sunglasses also available in cnady apple green, bubblegum blue and black
Now they may look like ladies glasses so maybe you can buy her a pair and get your special treat, but for the the select few that can pull them off, these babies are a beauty.
police 8103 sunglasses also available in silver and red.
The middle ground stylish sexy slash corporate number without looking too bling. Great coverage.
spy haymaker sunglasses coco creme fade.
Like their name suggests, the Haymakers konked me out with their awesomeness. Last pair i saw cost about p9050, but there are other knock-offs out there. To find these sunnies, Stoked Inc. is usually the best bet, but a little walking around never hurt anyone, especially if you are walking off the Beer gut, you lazy bum!! Get your body ready for the beach.
ACCESSORIES
Now walking around in the Metro during summer equipped with your Boardshorts and Sunglasses and swag, how about just add that extra Booyakasha (lord have mercy) when you walk with your ipod/mp3 player blaring dem summer beats through these babies:
skullcandy G.I rasta headphones in black
Now if these don’t sear Bob Marley onto the surface of your cranium via the ear canal, what will?
skullcandy T.I (titanium) rasta headphones in gold foil
These will get you bumping like a reggaeton superstar, the titanium enforced speakers truly deliver them brain-numbing beats.
Skullcandy allows you to find the headphones that fit your personality. Not only do the look awesome, they also allow you to interchange the earpieces just in case you wear the foam out quickly. Also check out the METALLICA signature series. Skullcandy can be found in the A.SHOP or BRATPACK. The TI series will set you back bout P4050
In the next summer series, greatly appreciated bikini numbers for the ladies as told by men. killer tsinelas the croc eliminatahs! and sling bags.
Love, Peace and Inspiration.
i was a pre-school teacher then a grade school teacher for a few years before plowing into the corporate sector. we were limited to a few, some poorly-made uniform sets which somehow exaggerated my flaws and just made my skin sallow with all the wrong colors.
if i were still a teacher now and if i weren’t restricted by uniforms, i would have played a hip and happening vintage schoolmarm vibe. i’d mostly wear black, white and gray with sudden bursts of red and blue, in time with the fashionable navy look of the day, but not too entrenched in the norm. thus maintaining the sensibility and the credibility of a figure of authority, yet staying attuned to what’s happening in the world of vintage style.
i discovered www.modcloth.com through www.icanhascheezburger.com. it’s the perfect place for eccentric wearable finds, for the beat poets in all of us.
day-to-day semi-casual:
mallory keaton sweater
teacher's pet skirt
the top has quarter sleeves with moderate puff which should off-set the high-waist, super lean skirt. and the way the big bow is designed, it doesn’t look tacky nor pretentious. the same skirt would work wonderfully with a basic white tee or tank and pearls. and the skirt’s name is appropriate for the theme.
PTA meetings:
cosette dress
i don’t know about other teachers, but during pta meetings, i always tried to look sweet and charming, just in case some of the kids told untrue terror stories about teachers to their parents. and this dress would definitely convince parents that i would never throw calkboard erasers at their kids.
inter-school conferences:
chateau marmont dress
just making other participants jealous. a little victorian with the lace trim, yet utterly contemporary with the pleat detail and wide patent leather belt. watch the tongues wag in sour graping and envy.
field trip:
oldham street dress
it’s comfortable, conservative yet street savvy. would look fabulous with pointed flats, oversized sunglasses and a slouchy handbag. one of my favorite looks!
presentation to the board:
hollywood nights dress
this is the quintessential simply elegant dress. it shifts from day to night, so it’s good for the boardroom and the fine dining restaurant.
rainy afternoons helping kids get to their cars and buses:
thriller jacket
you’d surely be snug and warm even in the heaviest of rains. inspired by the king of pop’s iconic music video, this can add the much needed wow factor in my usually humdrum way of life. i’d wish it rained everyday.
the shoes and accessories:
high stakes heels
even cowgirls get the blues bag
the shirelles oxfords
and this one has to be my favorite, hands-down:
carriage ride wedges
i’m sorry… let me just… catch my breath for a minute… this is my no. 1 wedge! classic t-strap design, the right shade and material. hidden platform at the front, tapered at the heels. i don’t know… this just pounds me like a sledgehammer. what do you think of it??
it’s barbie’s 50th year and what 50-year existence it has been! she has been married multiple times, been a vet and an astronaut (among many other professions), owned an innumerable amount of cars and houses, been in and out of controversy (most recently being the tattoo fiasco).
i was a barbie fan growing up, owning about 14 of her (though i think two or three of those were knock-offs). my most memorable would have to be the one where you get to braid her long blonde locks with a gadget that looks somehow like a mixer. this has a new version in totally hair braid-it barbie, but nothing beats the original. my cousin jill had the one whose voluminous dress had glow-in-the dark stars. and i remember both of us drooling over the peaches-and-cream barbie everytime its tvc came on.
i may have outgrown playing with the dolls, but i don’t think i’ll ever get tired of her style. right now, i’m loving the barbie on location collection, where you find her in milan, monte carlo, barcelona and south beach.
barbie on location barcelona
someone please get me that gold jacket in my size!
that’s a fantastic cover-up. it plunges, it’s just the right sheer, the cut is flattering, not frumpy at all. overall, my favorite swimwear image.
barbie on location milan
 it’s barbie with a deep tan and dark locks!
absolutely classy! from the side-parted hair and low half-ponytail to the white pointed stiletto heels. the suit has just the right sheen to it, the pants cut slim at the thighs and wide at the ankles. i would definitely wear something like this. well, somewhere, someday.
barbie on location south beach
when barbie tries to do boho, she’s still perfectly polished. i adore every detail of this one, the frayed pants with pocket details, the coral top with embellishments, the stray hair escaping from her hat, and the crescent handbag.
barbie on location monte carlo
please tell me there are bags somewhere just like that red and that black one. big enough for me, of course.
i simply like the idea that this one’s not all matchy-matchy. i never imagined wearing an indigo puff-sleeved top with light gray ruched skirt. plus the brown clutch, fishnet stockings and black pointed heels. who knew such disparate pieces would definitely work very well together?
here’s to stealing fashion ideas from barbie!
the gladiator sandals have evolved into shoes that bind. they have moved away from the flat, ancient roman design to the dizzying heights of stiletto heels, reminding you more of raunchy s&m outtakes than coliseum adventures.
and no one makes bondage shoes more beautifully than stella luna. i dare you to resist them.
plum and white leather. also available in black.
this one just blew me away, especially the plum-colored one. the straps are leather cut-outs with lining on the underside making it very comfortable to wear despite its pain-inducing look. makes you want to wear it when you’re hanging out with lady gaga. or when you feel like lady gaga yourself.
black and cream textured leather. with chunky platform and tapered heels.
the geometric design makes this the most unique, its textured matte surface off-sets the stern pattern. it rises over your ankles, making it flattering for even heavy calves (like mine). wear it and watch your feet get caged for good.
black leather with stiletto heels. also available in white.
as if the knee-high length isn’t enough to make you want to wield a whip, it also has have stiletto heels. makes you want to torture some poor fellow in bed.
red leather with satin ankle strap. also available in white and black.
i find that this can go from the boardroom to the club to the wedding reception. with a combination of leather and satin, it can work for when you mean business and when you mean pleasure. if i have to get married again (to the same man, of course) i’d like to wear the white one of this design.
white leather with contrast-color stitching. also available in black and wine (deep pink)
anybody want to be a porn star? or at least look as sexy? you’ll get partied-out with this number. the shoelaces are pretty useless, but the aesthetic effect will knock you over. the charm is also in the contrast-colored stitching.
blue patent leather with satin ankle strap. also available in black.
this is the other one that blew me away. its seamless patent is the creamiest i’ve ever worn, the glossiest i’ve ever seen. the ruched satin ankle straps (similar to the red one above) make it naughty and formal at the same time. and the way it hugs your feet, it simply takes on your natural form, you think it would melt into you.
my favorites are the plum-colored pair of the first design i posted and the shimmering blue of the last one. i’d gladly bind myself into these beauties.
which ones are yours?
it was a new year, it was a new fetish. the one body part we want fat: lips. we want these puckers pouting like the mysteriously odd fishes we watch on animal planet. many girls want angelina jolie or beyonce lips. excuse me, i want mick jagger lips, or maybe jay-z, since we also mentioned beyonce.
the best way to do this is collagen injection. but for people who are not that desperate, scientific innovations in beauty have been established to serve those of lesser means. we have non-invasive lip treatments in tubes, all promising the same effects as collagen injections, all guaranteeing satisfaction. of course, i don’t believe that drivel, but where’s the enthusiasm without a little faith, right? so i decided, what the hell, might as well invest in something if i want hope for these scrawny lips.
first, i tried a low-risk investment.
sally hansen lip inflation (www.sallyhansen.com)
lip inflation comes in a no-nonsense package, and at less than php400.00 a pop, it wasn’t a difficult decision.
pros: it smells nice, it’s extremely shiny and the shade doesn’t overwhelm. in fact, it’s so sheer, it’s translucent, but i suppose that’s the idea. it makes your lips look silky smooth and soft, no wrinkles nor cracks. i like the cooling minty feel and the wet look it provides. ideal for everyday wear, if you can tolerate the cons.
cons: very goopy. if you’re the type who slathers for maximum shine, i should warn you that the product will run into the corners of your mouth after a few minutes, making you look as if you’re gathering spit. so a little restraint for over-glossers like me. during windy weather, your hair will stick to your lips as if you applied honey on them.
does it work like it says?: my lips did look more shapely and defined in photos, but that can also be an optical illusion. you see, lip inflation shimmers in golden tones, not silvery like most lip products. i read somewhere that gold gives the illusion of fullness, perhaps thus the lip plumping effect.
all in all: worth it for the price i pay. i use it for the everyday shine and moisture. will i buy another shade? yes, i would.
the next i tried was a riskier investment.
o-plump from smashbox. www.smashbox.com
the first thing i notice about it is it’s size. it’s too tiny for the almost php1,500.00 you have to shell out for it. but the features are very intriguing. its blurbs do mention the cursory plumping effect, but they stress more on its other characteristics. first off, it seems like a really smart one, with the sub-name intuitive lip plumper. i didn’t know cosmetics can have intuition. maybe later, other lip gloss will develop e.s.p. too.
why intuitive? well, it reacts to your lips’ natural chemistry. the product is actually a clear, viscous liquid (you know how your clear watery snot looks and feels like? the product looks and feels just like that), but once you apply, it turns into your own custom shade of pink that looks absolutely natural. shiny, not overbearing.
not at all goopy nor sticky, you can lip-lock with your man without fear. it also has that minty cool feel, which by now i have realized is actually the common feature of all lip plumping products.
does it work like it says? i can’t really tell. and i don’t have before-and-after photos yet to make a sound judgment. is it worth the price? for its features, definitely. for the size, no. would i consider it a good investment? i’ll sleep on this assessment first.
back to a more reasonably-priced lip plumper.
prestige wonder-full
 i like prestige lip glosses because they come in fabulous diva colors for when you feel like courtney thorne-smith or jennifer aniston in the mid 90′s. that is, all the color without the showgirl. i have loved prestige’s lip vinyl in the past, so in terms of color and shine, this is my favorite.
it glides on creamy, but not overly sticky. the color has good staying power, especially if you stay away from balbacua and humba for lunch. it doesn’t leave a serious mark on my drinking bottle and it doesn’t gather along the corners of my mouth. for a lip gloss with good staying power, this one is better than all the other long-wearing lip gloss i’ve tried, because it certainly doesn’t make your lips feel dry. but if you’re not accustomed to wearing color, this would feel pretty heavy.
it uses maxi-lip(tm) technology, the cosmetic treatment proven to reduce lines, improve moisture and fatten your lips with everyday use. i don’t know if i would also believe that it increases collagen too. ideally, with repeated use, this should give a semi-permanent plump. and btw, this is the same technology used in lip plumpers of bloom and pout. incidentally, all these three brands are found in your nearest beauty bar.
does it work like it says? like sally hansen, it also gives the illusion of fullness since i’m using a shade with gold flecks. i’m getting compliments from co-workers about how my lips look, so i suppose it does reduce lines and dryness. as for actual plumping, too early to tell; maxi-lip(tm) technology takes a few days before results are visible, so we’ll see. worth the money? at just below php400.oo, you bet.
here’s some bad news (for those of you who live in caves and don’t know yet): the cosmetics brand pout has ceased production. it had its glory days when celebs like j-lo, britney, beyonce and kate hudson were known to use its products. but the good news is: clearance on the remaining pout cosmetics in beauty bar.
pout plump
including the pout plump lip gloss. just under php500.00 from an original retail price of over php1500.00. now that’s a good bargain on a bad note…
pout plump lip gloss uses the same maxi-lip(tm) treatment as prestige wonder-full.
i am curious too how duwop’s lip venom lip plumping gloss works. i heard it works like magic mainly because it irritates your lips. you know, like applying siling labuyo straight to your lips. is this true? i haven’t bought it because it’s too tiny at nearly php1500.00. i have other obligations, you know. like mascara and pedicure, for instance.
come to think of it, i did try applying hot sauce on my lips. now this is the best lip plumper in the market.
tabasco pepper sauce. www.tabasco.com
if you can stand the heat, try it (i love spicy food, so this is not a very far-fetched idea to me). your lips will swell within seconds. then just apply some lip balm to soothe your skin, top it with your favorite lip color, and you’re ready to go. although i don’t know if this is safe for daily use…
i maintain another blog with profound bs like fine art and philosophy. occasional entries talk about intense feeling like loathing or guilt-tripping on capital sins, earlier ones make brief commentaries on contemporary classic literature. if i have the time and energy, i’d write there about aquinas’ summa theologica or kant’s critique of pure reason. but i won’t be making much sense.
so i decided to put up another blog, proof of my evolutionary state today. and i will talk about fashion. and cheesy films and tv shows. pop music. face gunk, of course! greasy fast food and short order dishes. oh, computer games for amateurs like me. let’s see… and all other things we don’t take seriously. in other words, all other things in multi-billion-dollar industries.
so for the first time in my life, i will post my picture and caption what i’m wearing. yes, i will play fashion blogger because i can and because cyberspace is free space!
green ruffle-sleeves top from tyler. sunglasses from marc by marc jacobs.
that was taken on a valentine’s day, the very day i refuse to wear red. if i wear red on valentine’s day, please stab a blunt kitchen knife into my pancreas. wherever that is.
matte gold belt from ensembles. dark wide leg denim pants from warehouse.
i only wear wide leg or boot cut pants. not even your classic everyone-ought-to-have straight cut pants. given i am not blessed with legs, i have to work around my limitations. most especially, no way will i squeeze myself into skinny pants. if that happens, no more kitchen knives into obscure internal organs, just behead me outright. let’s make it a fast one.
that’s actually just the second belt i’ve ever bought in my life. i used to think belts will make me look like segmented chorizo, but i’ve grown to like them now. i tried on the wide ones in stores, the belts that should fit snugly around your upper waist. you know, the trendy, usually embellished ones with buckles that could murder? they’re the ones that make me look like segmented chorizo. again, my personal limits as an imperfect human form.
so here i am, jumping into the fun and frivolous superficial bandwagon!
i am shallow.
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